I quickly realized that I was stuck in a very unsatisfactory loop. Even though I was the one holding the whip, Big Steve was calling the shots. At one point, the wrangler jokingly laughed at my attempts to “motivate” Big Steve. He said that when I used my whip, my mule undoubtedly thought it was a fly on his butt!
I initially assumed the Ole’ Boy would appreciate my light touch and would pick up his speed to please me. My assumption proved wrong when, instead of going faster, he actually slowed down! I needed a radical shift in my moves because I was trailing further and further behind.
I see this dynamic all the time in relationships. One spouse pressures their partner to pick up the pace; whether it’s to be a better listener, contribute more financially, or to change in some other way. Like in my dynamic with Big Steve, it usually takes awhile before the light bulb goes on… the only tool for change that we possess is ourselves. In my next lesson, I will share how I changed what I was doing and how that impacted Big Steve.
Until then, Blessings! ~ Deb